We spoke about our hometowns, our “favorites,” and our family. “Is that because dating such a woman is too much for your fragile male ego? “It’s my preference,” he said coolly, like we were debating whether he preferred women who are athletic to women who are into the arts, not a dating choice that screamed I like my women subordinate.
Then the topic of work came up, and I told him I was a writer. I took a long sip from my drink, smiling into the glass rim, holding back the verbal whiplash I wanted to impose on him. To many, Chad’s “preference” seems like just that—a preference. He essentially told me to my face that he needed power over his future wife, a slippery-slope of a mindset that feeds into and is a prelude for those who commit sexual assault and harassment.
I asked my Facebook friends if they had any sexist date stories like mine, and within 45 minutes my post garnered more than 10 responses.
One commenter said her date admitted to her he didn’t like tattoos on women, despite having many himself.
It’s even the guy from Bumble who tells you over a bowl of mac and cheese that successful women threaten him.
And the problem won’t stop until everyone else realizes it, too—and we actually do something about it.
Submitted by caitlins43ea9ae84 I actually catfished someone, but this was 15 years ago before it was a phenomenon.
As catfish stories go, things got intense fast, there was talk of him visiting, so naturally, I did something dramatic.
I paid .95 to a sketchy Internet look up service and found out he was married with two children. I gave him my real number so we'd talk on the phone everyday — he'd call me.
If I can’t even make it through a simple meal without an harmfully archaic view of women, it’s no wonder women face such momentous obstacles in every facet of life—from not getting that raise despite having the qualifications to having our bodies seen as public space to not being believed when we report our sexual assaults.
Of course, my limited experiences and the experiences of a dozen women on my Facebook page can’t show the full extent to which this problem actually exists in society, but the dates I went on showed me a pretty accurate scale of the rape culture we’re up against.
I’d expect this kind of mentality from a Twitter troll, but not from a seemingly cultured adult man. Yet here I was, feeling like a had just stepped on a bomb in Minecraft.
After this date, I started to pick up on the blatant sexist and misogynistic things guys from my dating apps would say without batting an eye.
Submitted by De Anna Hall (Facebook) I got this message one day from a boy who I went to school with, and he was like, "There's a chick down here on Tinder and Instagram that is using your photos and a few of my footy mates said they've been tuning her." I tried to search her but I was blocked and so were my two best friends and my family so I had to get a person from work to look her up.